Okay, I’ve got a bit of problem. The pool of women that I’m physically attracted to is drying up fast. I’ve already got a woman that I love very much, so it’s not like I’m still shopping around, but I still like to look. I like a woman with curves and a healthy glow. The kind of woman that’s not afraid to laugh or smile and show that she loves life.
These gorgeous, carefree souls are being replaced by bland, blonde stick people. They’re all this sort of reddish-brown color, too. It’s disturbing. Armed with dazzling smiles that never quite reach their eyes, these carbon copies ooze their insincerity and insecurity all over everything they touch. They call their healthy-looking counterparts fat and get angry when you point out the fact that their ribs are ugly.
Now, people tell me that this is because girls are trying to meet the standards the media imposes on celebrities. They say it’s the fault of girl’s magazines and reality TV. I have a different theory.
The pretty ones are being assimilated into the Bland Collective and made into more stick people. Resistance is not futile, ladies. Women are supposed to have curves, not angles, damn it.
I apologize for the coming lack of posts and for the lack of any media in this one. My laptop had coffee spilled on it by, and I’m not naming any names, one of the dogs. It sat, powered on, for about half an hour (the computer, not the animal) before anyone noticed. When I finally saw it and tried to shut it down, there was a small “pop!” and the screen went black. It doesn’t look good for the poor thing. I’ll still be reading and commenting where possible. Much love.